vukgfk emn't bspfb giybrcil c fgy giyxmrk
c'x skguuh imb skucgzuk
vkiih cf imb skucgzuk kctrks
bcy rmwkvks cf, c'vk fvkib fm xuoh bcxk gic wkkmsb ykkvcil rks fgwk- hmu guu ikke bm bsufb rks
Showing posts with label scared. Show all posts
Showing posts with label scared. Show all posts
Monday, 16 April 2012
Monday, 13 February 2012
Kitten Monday #25
[i think i might be onto something]
[i apologise for the coded message earlier but for now it is necessary]
[tik i'm sorry I've been avoiding you at school but the continual deletion of attempts to repost the last few posts on time waits for no-one mean that penny is still at large and i don't want to risk it.]
[if you could perhaps supply me with the current password then i could post the posts you have given me?]
[for now, dear waking, here are some fluffy felines to ease your mood.]
[everything will become clear soon]
[i apologise for the coded message earlier but for now it is necessary]
[tik i'm sorry I've been avoiding you at school but the continual deletion of attempts to repost the last few posts on time waits for no-one mean that penny is still at large and i don't want to risk it.]
[if you could perhaps supply me with the current password then i could post the posts you have given me?]
[for now, dear waking, here are some fluffy felines to ease your mood.]
Wednesday, 8 February 2012
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
every time I close my eyes I see the maze.
i'm not afraid of you.
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
every time I close my eyes I see the maze.
i'm not afraid of you.
Sunday, 1 January 2012
whatthemetricfuck.avi
I feel kinda stupid now. Apologies for the lack of updates, I got very sick in the week leading up to christmas (literally, I couldn't keep any food down, ehehe) and then we went away on the 24th, and we got back yesterday. I had intended to queue some Kitten Mondays but due to my illness I forgot.
After this post, I will commence to queue a months worth of Kitten Mondays.
But back to the matter at hand. Yesterday, a post, presumably by me during one of my Waking periods, appeared on this blog and it is utterly cryptic.
I only dimly remember being Awake that day, and it took me quite some time to remember that I had been awake at all. (Tik thought that by "awake" I meant physically awake instead of Awake, which is why she made that comment about being asleep at 2 in the afternoon) Although I remember having a staring contest with It for quite a while, and being quite...angry with it, I don't remember writing that post. I think I slammed the window at some point, and I might have yelled at it for a bit, but I don't remember posting on the blog and the whole "one and two and three and four" thing is just pissing me off because I don't understand it.
By the way, the girl speaking to me in this video (who also appears at the end) is Tik, in case you didn't realise.
Ciao for now,
Ary
After this post, I will commence to queue a months worth of Kitten Mondays.
But back to the matter at hand. Yesterday, a post, presumably by me during one of my Waking periods, appeared on this blog and it is utterly cryptic.
I only dimly remember being Awake that day, and it took me quite some time to remember that I had been awake at all. (Tik thought that by "awake" I meant physically awake instead of Awake, which is why she made that comment about being asleep at 2 in the afternoon) Although I remember having a staring contest with It for quite a while, and being quite...angry with it, I don't remember writing that post. I think I slammed the window at some point, and I might have yelled at it for a bit, but I don't remember posting on the blog and the whole "one and two and three and four" thing is just pissing me off because I don't understand it.
By the way, the girl speaking to me in this video (who also appears at the end) is Tik, in case you didn't realise.
Ciao for now,
Ary
Sunday, 2 October 2011
The Waking Dreamer
Note: If you read nothing else in this entry, PLEASE read the last paragraph. I need help with this.)
I'm really sorry I've been so incoherent lately. It's been...pretty weird for me recently. I've slept very little (maybe six hours a night at the absolute most) since I Woke up, and sometimes I have these periods where I'm not just awake but Awake.
Waking is weird. You know how when you're in a dream everything seems a little bit fragmented or disjointed, like it doesn't quite make sense? Being Awake is like that. It's kinda like the White Text Story. I still don't know where the hell that came from, it hasn't happened again, but being Awake is like that.
It doesn't happen often (once every three days or so), and it never lasts long. Usually at night, or in daylight when I'm alone, for less than an hour. It's the only time I can see It. Otherwise I can't see It at all, not while awake anyway.
I can't fall asleep while I'm Awake. Well, I can, but it's really difficult, and if I do I dream about being chased through a maze by...something...probably It. It's always right behind me, and I never have the courage to turn around. And then when I wake up I feel nauseous and end up scrambling to the bathroom and throwing up weird black stuff.
On the upside, if I fall asleep normally, I don't Dream. I dream, but they're normal. The concerning thing is, I think It might still be there, standing in the garden next to the rope swing I used to play on as a kid, staring at me. And unless I'm Awake, I can't even see it.
Tik Tok was right when she said I had to Wake up. I just panicked when I did. It's been right there for who knows how long- since this started? Since before? Did I name this blog "Wakingdream" as a subconscious thing?
Where the fuck do I go from here...
First order of business? The throwing up black stuff. I know there are other bloggers out there, somebody has to know what's up with this and if possible how I can get rid of it safely since just flushing it down the toilet seems a tad risky. I'm gonna comb through the blogs tonight to see if I can find anything- if anybody finds anything or knows where I can find information, PLEASE tell me!
Ciao for now,
Ary
(P.S. I promise Kitten Monday will be on time tomorrow, and from then onwards I'm going to start queuing them, so yeah.)
I'm really sorry I've been so incoherent lately. It's been...pretty weird for me recently. I've slept very little (maybe six hours a night at the absolute most) since I Woke up, and sometimes I have these periods where I'm not just awake but Awake.
Waking is weird. You know how when you're in a dream everything seems a little bit fragmented or disjointed, like it doesn't quite make sense? Being Awake is like that. It's kinda like the White Text Story. I still don't know where the hell that came from, it hasn't happened again, but being Awake is like that.
It doesn't happen often (once every three days or so), and it never lasts long. Usually at night, or in daylight when I'm alone, for less than an hour. It's the only time I can see It. Otherwise I can't see It at all, not while awake anyway.
I can't fall asleep while I'm Awake. Well, I can, but it's really difficult, and if I do I dream about being chased through a maze by...something...probably It. It's always right behind me, and I never have the courage to turn around. And then when I wake up I feel nauseous and end up scrambling to the bathroom and throwing up weird black stuff.
On the upside, if I fall asleep normally, I don't Dream. I dream, but they're normal. The concerning thing is, I think It might still be there, standing in the garden next to the rope swing I used to play on as a kid, staring at me. And unless I'm Awake, I can't even see it.
Tik Tok was right when she said I had to Wake up. I just panicked when I did. It's been right there for who knows how long- since this started? Since before? Did I name this blog "Wakingdream" as a subconscious thing?
Where the fuck do I go from here...
First order of business? The throwing up black stuff. I know there are other bloggers out there, somebody has to know what's up with this and if possible how I can get rid of it safely since just flushing it down the toilet seems a tad risky. I'm gonna comb through the blogs tonight to see if I can find anything- if anybody finds anything or knows where I can find information, PLEASE tell me!
Ciao for now,
Ary
(P.S. I promise Kitten Monday will be on time tomorrow, and from then onwards I'm going to start queuing them, so yeah.)
Saturday, 24 September 2011
Tuesday, 13 September 2011
waking up
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
SEE I CAN DO THE SHITTY LABYRINTH MOTIFS NOW TOO.
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck i should never have woken up
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
can't sleep minotaur will eat me
SEE I CAN DO THE SHITTY LABYRINTH MOTIFS NOW TOO.
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck i should never have woken up
Monday, 12 September 2011
Kitten Monday #14
Hi guys! Thought I might upload a Kitten Monday ON AN ACTUAL MONDAY FOR ONCE ahahahahaha I'm so funny. I'm about halfway through my folder of kitten pictures, so I still have a while before I'll need to "restock".
I keep losing time, just little spots of twenty minutes at the longest. It's happened at school and while I'm trying to study at home. According to my family and Penny I just sit there and don't do anything, which ought to be reassuring but instead is just making me nervous. I still haven't figured out what was with the weird text with the white background in my last post is about either. It's all talking about mazes and leaves...har har, geniuses, I KNOW my name is Ariadne. Talking about LABYRINTHS? Oh MAN, that's original.
Fuck.
I can't sleep properly at the moment, either- I just get little snatches or catnaps, which is kind of unhelpful since I am in the middle of my mock/practice exams. I'm kinda worried about my marfv
WAKE UP.
I keep losing time, just little spots of twenty minutes at the longest. It's happened at school and while I'm trying to study at home. According to my family and Penny I just sit there and don't do anything, which ought to be reassuring but instead is just making me nervous. I still haven't figured out what was with the weird text with the white background in my last post is about either. It's all talking about mazes and leaves...har har, geniuses, I KNOW my name is Ariadne. Talking about LABYRINTHS? Oh MAN, that's original.
Fuck.
I can't sleep properly at the moment, either- I just get little snatches or catnaps, which is kind of unhelpful since I am in the middle of my mock/practice exams. I'm kinda worried about my marfv
WAKE UP.
Wednesday, 7 September 2011
Kitten Monday #13
Awright, Kittens first, update on Waking afterwards.
Okay, so I went off my meds on Monday. Went to sleep expecting some kind of huge thing to happen. Like a nightmare or an epic battle in the centre of my mind or some shit.
I had a dream about a maze made out of a forest, branches interlocking to form a Labyrinth, and I knew the way out and I was running towards the exit for ages and ages and ages, and when I woke up I promptly hurled weird black stuff. That's all.
Have I woken up?
I don't know, I don't feel any different. I've had normal dreams and stuff, and I don't feel ti
I am princess of leaves and run until I cannot see them, just walls and run and run until I am walking through my lungs, setting my lifeline, it's keeping me and no matter what, I am going.
I can hear birds and run until I collapse, feeling it reach out and still I am following the ground in front of leaves and run and small animals but I am going.
I am going.
I am following the omega, it reach out and still I run and tell myself not to run, dragging deep breaths through my lungs, setting my lungs, setting my veins on fire.
My legs start to run, dragging deep breaths through a maze, a forcefield.
I cannot see them, just walls and run and find me, and small animals but I am walking through a maze, a forcefield.
I am princess of the maze.
I breathe deep, and the end, the end, the alpha and run until I am princess of me.
I don't turn around.
...What the actual fuck.
Okay, comment: is it Princess of the Maze (obvs reference to the Ariadne of Classical mythology, c'mon) or Princess of Leaves and what the hell does "run until I am princess of me" mean?"
"a maze, a forcefield"? okay, what? and how can one walk through their lungs?
I don't understand. I really don't.
Welp.
Okay, so I went off my meds on Monday. Went to sleep expecting some kind of huge thing to happen. Like a nightmare or an epic battle in the centre of my mind or some shit.
I had a dream about a maze made out of a forest, branches interlocking to form a Labyrinth, and I knew the way out and I was running towards the exit for ages and ages and ages, and when I woke up I promptly hurled weird black stuff. That's all.
Have I woken up?
I don't know, I don't feel any different. I've had normal dreams and stuff, and I don't feel ti
I am princess of leaves and run until I cannot see them, just walls and run and run until I am walking through my lungs, setting my lifeline, it's keeping me and no matter what, I am going.
I can hear birds and run until I collapse, feeling it reach out and still I am following the ground in front of leaves and run and small animals but I am going.
I am going.
I am following the omega, it reach out and still I run and tell myself not to run, dragging deep breaths through my lungs, setting my lungs, setting my veins on fire.
My legs start to run, dragging deep breaths through a maze, a forcefield.
I cannot see them, just walls and run and find me, and small animals but I am walking through a maze, a forcefield.
I am princess of the maze.
I breathe deep, and the end, the end, the alpha and run until I am princess of me.
I don't turn around.
...What the actual fuck.
Okay, comment: is it Princess of the Maze (obvs reference to the Ariadne of Classical mythology, c'mon) or Princess of Leaves and what the hell does "run until I am princess of me" mean?"
"a maze, a forcefield"? okay, what? and how can one walk through their lungs?
I don't understand. I really don't.
Welp.
Monday, 5 September 2011
sleep
I figured it out.
I figured out how to wake up
To wake up you have to go to sleep! I get it now! The only way you can "wake up" is from sleep. Real sleep, not what I'm getting now with the medication. Proper sleep. I
I was looking at the drawings I posted photos of earlier, and it says "Only the sleeping can wake" and that's how I figured it out. I can't believe I didn't realise it beforehand...
I'll post a Kitten Monday tomorrow, on Tuesday. I would post one now but I'm meant to be studying so I only have time for one short post, but I promise you all, Kittens tomorrow. I won't go back on my word!
Ciao for now!
Ariadne
Saturday, 6 August 2011
what the fuck is this
I have this pad of paper on my desk. It's A2 size and I doodle on it and leave notes to myself and stuff. I woke up this morning and found writing almost covering it. A few points to start on before I show you the image
1. Most if the text is some variant on "wake up".
2. There are also occurrences of "tik tok", "time is running out", "the dreamer must wake" pictures of clocks, one drawing of a person sleeping, the roman numeral II, a picture of our faceless friend, "only the blind can see, only the sleeping can truly wake", and the title of my blog.
3. It's all in my handwriting. All of it.
4. Fuck my life up the ass with an assortment of rusty garden tools.
5. And a chainsaw.
Photos, for the curious:
I don't know what to do. I just want this all to be a nightmare.
Please, please let it be a nightmare.
1. Most if the text is some variant on "wake up".
2. There are also occurrences of "tik tok", "time is running out", "the dreamer must wake" pictures of clocks, one drawing of a person sleeping, the roman numeral II, a picture of our faceless friend, "only the blind can see, only the sleeping can truly wake", and the title of my blog.
3. It's all in my handwriting. All of it.
4. Fuck my life up the ass with an assortment of rusty garden tools.
5. And a chainsaw.
Photos, for the curious:
Welp.
Looks like I'm fucked. Not even the inside of my own head is safe anymore. I can't even trust myself?
I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I've read the other blogs, blogs about people fighting- there was even a blog in my area, manned by two fighters but they don't remember now, and I'm glad for them, but the fact is I'm a scrawny high school girl who can't even run the cross country without wanting to collapse right afterwards. And running is not an option. I'm sixteen, I'll either be alone or with Penny, and there are dodgy people out there.
I don't know what to do. I just want this all to be a nightmare.
Please, please let it be a nightmare.
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