Monday 7 May 2012

nightmare orchestra

I can't tell when I'm waking or sleeping anymore.

I've been posting every day since last wednesday, but I'm not sure if any of them are going through. I'm pretty sure I'm awake now cause I just cut my own throat in my dream and now I'm in my room, so I'm typing this before I lose more time. According to Tik I'm functioning normally from the outside, but I never know if I'm in the dream world or not until I take a leap of faith and swan-dive out the window or stab myself in the gut.

I don't necessarily have to die in the dream world to snap back out of it, I just need to hurt myself, but nonfatal wounds stay with me when I wake up. My school counsellor is trying to get me to see a psychologist about my "self-harm."

2 comments:

  1. Like I said when you talked to me, none of them seem to be going through. This is the first one in a week.
    Also, I figured I'd comment so you'd know it went through.

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  2. It went through.

    Goddammit, eventually you're going to pick the wrong time to try stabbing yourself or leaping out a window. Quit doing that shit.

    Try pinching yourself?

    Envisioning impossible scenerios in dreams could help you realize it.

    And understand this: This is your dream. In your dream, you are *GOD*. Look into Lucid Dreaming. That's the only thing I can think of.

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